A secret skill
There’s something one of my best friends does that pisses me off in a delightful way.
She’s infuriatingly good at asking follow-up questions. We can be on the phone for an hour and I’ll realize we’ve been talking about me the whole time.
Two things happen when I come to:
I feel like the most interesting person in the world, and
I feel awful for hogging up the entire conversation
When I voice this, she makes it clear she just wants to know what’s going on in my life. But I still find I have to do a full stop and shift our chat to what’s going on in hers.
One of the biggest insights I’ve experienced this year is this:
Curiosity is a skill. It can be practiced and improved.
Before I started coaching, I felt like a sociopath because I wasn’t super interested in other people. But after months of pursuing conversations and asking follow-up questions, I felt a genuine increase in fascination. Now I think, Every human being is an anomaly.
There’s a cliche which states that the most interesting people are those who are most interested in people. I’ve seen this pan out.
Not that I’m curious to curry favor or trick others into liking me. But I’ve seen firsthand that people are more willing to spend time and money with me when I make them feel like the most interesting person on the planet.
Now, my friend and I have a secret battle to be the first to dive into the other person’s life. We’ll exchange deets for two hours, and I’ll think: Damn…WE’RE the most interesting people alive.
Practicing curiosity will improve our relationships, conversations, and overall worldview.
“If you could choose to be fascinated by the world around you, wouldn’t you?”