For years, I said that family was one of the most important things to me. But that was a lie.
How do I know?
Because my actions tell the whole story. I never went out of my way to help my mom. I rarely spent quality time with my sister, aunts, or uncles. I visited my other half of the family when it was convenient.
Billionaire industrialist and vigilante Bruce Wayne once said, “It’s not who I am underneath, but what I do that defines me.”
The cliche states that actions speak louder than words. Basically, anyone can talk. Talking is easy. It feels good. Sometimes, people are so good at talking, they trick themselves into thinking they’ve already done something.
That’s why ideas, plans, and roadmaps bore me. It’s all just words.
That’s not to say we shouldn’t prep for the future. I’m just far more interested in what a person is doing than what they say they’d like to do.
(Keep in mind, I’m criticizing myself here.)
Here’s a pretty personal example.
One of my close friends has basically been radio silent for the past year. He doesn’t answer my calls or texts. I worry about his health and wellbeing. I get no answers.
He sent me a super long text on my birthday a few weeks ago. He apologized profusely. He told me how much he loved and respected me. Reading it made me cry at my dining room table.
When I responded to try to set up a call…nothing. I haven’t heard from him since.
Anyone can talk. It’s through our consistent actions that we prove who we really are (thanks, Batman).
If we want to be kind and loving friends, we have to show our friends we support them and are curious about them. If we want to care about our health, we have to exercise regularly and eat mostly well. If we want to be productive, we have to sit down and do the work every week.
So what can we do with all this?
Try this exercise: Take five minutes and write out all the things you value most. Then, take another five minutes and write about the actions you take on a regular basis for those things.
Notice where things are lacking. What can you do more or less of? What needs to change?
As always, let me know how it goes. 😎