I wanted to hate NYC—I don’t
Sunday was the first night of my two-week trial run living in Brooklyn. It was heavenly.
I get anxious every time I see the Manhattan skyline. Coming into New York City always feels like I’m entering a foreign warzone. My survival instincts kick in and I feel awake and on guard.
Last month, I talked with a friend who’s planning to move out of state and away from where she grew up—just like me. She’s continued to push the date back, so I lovingly called her out.
“It sounds like you’re creating reasons to not do it,” I said. Luckily for me, this landed well.
This is an unfortunate human tendency: constantly building conditions that must be met before doing the scary things we know will make us grow. We think: once I…
have more money
feel more confident
get a new job
…Then I’ll be ready. But conditions will never be perfect. Any meaningful life decision will come with 1000 logical-sounding reasons for not doing it.
And yet, this is what my brain has been going through. As much as I rebel against this, it turns out I’m human too. I’ve been contemplating all the reasons I shouldn’t move to New York. (This video didn’t help.)
I’d be leaving my well-established community—my mom, sister, and several best friends
It’s ridiculously expensive
Eventhough I’m a social extrovert, it’s scary to have to make new friends
Aside from creating as much income as I sustainably can in the coming months, the remedy for these fears seems obvious. I have to put myself out there.
It sounds simple (it is), but that tends to be the solution to most things.
I have a phobia of heights, so I put myself out there and tried top roping (rock climbing) with my friends. Last year, I had to build a coaching business from scratch, so I put myself out there and reached out to as many people as I could and offered to coach them. New York intimidates me, so I’m putting myself out there and am going to meetups and events by myself.
Tonight, I’m going to a chess gathering at a brewery. It’s called Chess & a Beer, two of my favorite things. For the last two nights, I’ve gone to dinner by myself. I also joined the local climbing gym.
Anyway, it’s hard not to jump back and forth between all the pros and cons of living here.
I walked through the local park and experienced more in 10 minutes than I do in one night in Annapolis. I heard at least six different languages spoken, saw a men’s league soccer game, got a free margarita from a cute bartender, ate excellent Mexican food, toured a gorgeous rooftop gym, and walked alongside the East River overlooking the lit up city of Manhattan.
This was all within a 20-minute walk of one another.
It’s been one full day. It feels like it’s been an entire week.
The journey continues.